Friday, May 17, 2013

The Benefit of a Sincere Compliment


Have you ever wondered what a compliment really means to someone? Have you ever seen someone with just incredibly well behaved kids and want to tell them but aren't sure? Or someone just rocking some awesome shoes or a shirt? Or what about a friend that is just absolutely brilliant? Or gorgeous? Or pee-your-pants hilarious? Do you ever tell them? If not, why not? What is the harm in passing a compliment.
Last night, I was getting into the car to go to a Relief Society meeting and one of the woman we were car pooling with turns around and goes "We were just talking about how beautiful you are." Whoa. Color me surprised. Sure, Jake tells me and trust me I don't take that for granted. And when I go to HI those cute old Polynesian men tell me I'm a beautiful haole girl- but they also tend to be the ones that would say a fish is beautiful so you just say thank you and move on? My whole life, I always just thought I was plain. Not ugly necessarily, but not attractive either. And now, I hear these women tell me how I am beautiful enough to be a model? Why don't people give just honest to goodness compliments all the time? What is it about saying something nice that seems to make someone vulnerable or something? I don't get it. I know that I tend to not tell people. For example, I think my siblings are just geniuses. All five of 'em. Do I tell them? Not so much.

My brother Jeff? I have incredible respect for him. He has had a hard life but he has turned it around. He is a husband, and a father and almost a pharmacist. That's a doctor. I wanted to cut off my little toe after my bachelors (well truthfully, only about 3 years in) and Jeff is a doctor? What. Nuts.

How about Jordan? Dude has almost 4 kids, a wife and is a chiropractor. What I said about being a doctor before, applies here as well. He lives out in the boonies being a doctor. That is pretty cool. He is living his dream. Lucky. And he is silly. But in a fun way. I like him.

How about Malcolm? Okay, now don't get me wrong, I think all my family are above average intelligence but I just think Mal is a make me feel like a dunce brilliant. Plus, what a nice guy. When I was a freshman, I called him to help me figure out speakers for my computer. So the next weekend he came to visit, he brought me speakers. A nice, sealed box of speakers, that I still use almost daily 6 six years later.

Shelly. Oh Shels. She lived in Africa- twice. What the heck? Isn't that scary? Why, yes yes it is. (Granted I think going even to Nevada where we have no family is scary so maybe I am not the best judge? Who knows.) And she is getting a Master's degree. I have an incredibly educated family- me? Not so much haha. You know what is kinda poopy but in a great way? Having an older sister that is smart, funny and beautiful.

And James. Little Jimmy. (who is in fact about 6 or 7 inches taller than me) His personality is totally wasted on a youngest child. He is so protective and caring and just wants to take care of everyone. Kinda great. Plus he is doing accounting. (smarty-pants) And then wants to be a lawyer! My little brother with floral suspenders, coke bottle glasses and gum boots a lawyer? Good on ya.

I have a pretty great family. I like them. I am sad that we live all over the place but we do a fairly good job of seeing each other and keeping in contact- not good enough to keep up with all the babies but still.
Well family, I hope that these sincere compliments made your day as much as the one I got yesterday.
Seriously? What a cool and intelligent looking family.
Love you!

Saturday, May 4, 2013

"I don't know what your generation's fascination is with documenting your every thought...

but I can assure you, they're not all diamonds" (Mr Griffith in Easy A- awesome movie, watch it. That's all)

Most of the time when I make a really good dinner I think to myself "Man this is so great, I need to take a picture and blog about it and maybe text the picture to my family. Everyone will be so amazed at what I did." And then I realize, what the heck is wrong with me? I am no great chef, I don't have a cooking blog and my family couldn't care less about a junk quality image of food that they can barely see and don't get to eat. 

It makes me wonder, when my mom made a kick-A meal for my dad did she grab the good ole camera and snap away and then mail copies to her friends and family? Hmm, probably not. I imagine they ate it, were pleased, and moved on.

Sometimes I think that I was born in the wrong generation. Don't get me wrong, I love my computer, my kindle, my television and all that other great stuff but my cell phone- I hate it. Today Mikey lost the battery to it on our walk (we found it eventually, extended our walk by about 20 minutes. I think it was a plot) and while I was worried that Jake wouldn't be able to get ahold of me to pick him up from work I was so excited. I didn't have a phone. I was off the grid so to speak. It was fantastic. I hate that I feel chained to that stupid little box. I leave it at home, or on my dresser for a day just to feel free. I hate Words with Friends- play scrabble with the people sitting next you, interact. It'll blow your mind. I hate twitter. Seriously, it is okay to have a little privacy in the world. I understand the benefit of things like facebook, twitter, cell phones, etc.- it makes the world small. It is so incredibly easy to stay in contact with family and friends. But you know what I have noticed. Because I read my facebook newsfeed, I feel like I know what is going on with people but in reality, I don't know them at all. I never actually talk to them. I think I do because I read their status updates and see their throwback thursday instagrams or whatever those are called, but in reality, I don't know anything. I am starting to get so content to just sit at home with my boys and feel like reading facebook and blogs are sufficient adult interaction. But in all actuality, it is not. When I spend time with my neighbors, or friends, I feel so much better. When I see Mikey run around with other kids, I feel like giving myself a mom point (a real one, not the sarcastic ones me and Shelly do because we think we are funny) because he is so much happier to be with other people.

I just think that maybe I would've fit better with the previous generation. Who knows. There probably would've been things I thought were silly then too. Like, bell bottoms. Blows my mind.