A Baby Story

Disclaimer: This is a long post so if you skip the words and only look at the pictures, I won't judge- or even know.

Adam Pōki`i Logan

Born 4:08 am
20 inches

9lbs 1 oz

 

Doesn't he look so much like Mikey? I mean he is a lot bigger but still, crazy right? I had Jake take a picture of Adam on the scale just like Mikey so we could really see how similar they look.

Mikey Boy!
18.5 inches and 7lbs 6oz

Baby Adam!

So! Let me tell you all about this. On December 15 I was 39 weeks so I went into the hospital for an elective induction. I got in at about 7am and I was checked and at under 2 cm, posterior, and 70% effaced- not exactly the best start to an induction but I was still started on the pitocin.  My contractions started hard and fast at just the smallest dose and me and Jake were thrilled. We were going to have a baby! But by 3pm, I still hadn't progressed so they turned the pitocin off and once they started it again, the contractions never did. My doctor came in and told me that if I didn't start progressing in the next hour or so I was going to be sent home. Not going lie, as disappointed as I was, I was mostly just so ready to go home, eat and lay in my bed crying while Jake held me.

So we left at about 7pm. We bought sandwiches and Krispy Kremes and watched White Collar on the living room floor.

I cried for a few days.

I cramped and contracted too.

  I went into the clinic on December 26 and they told me I was scheduled for a... citatec? induction late at night, around 11 pm, on Friday the 28th and no matter what happened, we were coming home with a baby this time.

We arranged for Jake's brother and his wife to watch Mikey while we were at the hospital

Well Friday night we were eating dinner and playing a game and the hospital called and my induction time was changed until 8pm! Wahoo!

We got to the hospital a little after 8, I was checked and still only a measly 2 cm, 70% effaced and way off to the left this time. My nurse Jessica, who was fantastic, started the medicine with the plan that I would get a second dose in 3 hours, a third dose in 3 more and then after 4 hours, I would get started on the pitocin.  After 3 hours, I had progressed one cm so they did another dose and man oh man did that stuff hurt. After about an hour, at 1am,  I called the nurse for an epidural because the pain was just too much for me. Dr. Stephensen came in and he was great too. He gave me the epidural and told us all kinds of different stories about crazy labors which stressed out Jessica really bad so she got the labor cart all ready, just in case I started progressing too fast.

And what a good plan that was. The epidural was not working at all. I could feel my legs going numb but the contractions were just as bad, maybe worse. They figured that I was going too fast for the epidural to work. They checked me again and I was 4 cm. They called Dr Somers to come in and break my water, but she lives about 40 minutes away. The epidural still wouldn't work. He kept giving me booster shots and told us stories about his travels to try and distract me from the pain. Dr Somers got to the hospital about 35 minutes later and I was 5 cm. It was 3:15am, and she broke my water and the pain just would not stop. I was basically in tears. And then to add insult to injury, Adam's heart rate started getting really inconsistent. He didn't have enough oxygen to make it through my contractions that were coming about every 1 to 1.5 minutes. Nuts. They wanted to slow my labor down because Adam wasn't doing well and we needed more time between contractions for him to try to get more oxygen. They gave me a shot of some medicine but it didn't work at all. We were pretty nervous. They were constantly moving me around to try to get Adam into a better position and I finally told the nurse that I was in too much pain. We checked me again and I was 10 cm! I did 5 cm in 35 minutes. It was 3:50a and my doctors attending physician just got there (my doc is a resident so another doctor had to be in the delivery room with her). I started pushing at 4 which was such a relief because Adam couldn't get enough oxygen. I pushed for 6 or 7 minutes and then they told me that Adam had very mild shoulder distortia (?) which just means that his shoulders were too big. I had to push a lot harder (luckily my epidural was extremely effective- I couldn't even feel pressure- awesome!) and he came out. A little blue and his cord was double wrapped around his neck with a lot of fluid in his lungs.

But good news- they got it all out of his lungs, the cord was unwrapped, cut and Adam turned pink.

Now he is doing great! Big and great! Mom and Dad are seriously tired, since we didn't get to sleep at all before I delivered but it was worth it.

Now the fun part! Pictures!

Mikey is very intrigued by Adam already. Giving him a kiss!



Our most recent family picture! Mikey does really well with being gentle and just smiles at Adam all the time

Just checking him out before he goes in for another kiss. He wanted to hold Adam and he actually did really well, kept his hand under his head the whole time

Adam stole my bed. But look at how cute! Wide awake and everything!

Adam is doing really well. Big baby, big eater, good sleeper. Likes to cuddle up in Jake's arm just like Mikey did- Jake is excited about it.
I am doing well too. Sore but that is completely to be expected. He is a big baby after all.
Wish us luck on our new adventure.
Hope you all have a great New Years!

Merry Christmas!

Unfortunately I am still pregnant. But the silver lining on our little black rain cloud is that we got to spend Christmas at home with Mikey. (I was pretty worried that I would be in the hospital for Christmas and Jake said that we would just postpone Christmas if that was the case but his parents were in town and I felt like that wasn't fair to them, but luckily -well sort of lucky- we did not have to worry about it at all)

Mikey is sick so he wasn't as enthusiastic as we thought he would be but he got spoiled rotten. He got a book of 100 words from Uncle Jeff and Auntie Whitney which we opened first- bad idea because then he just wanted to play with the book instead of opening more presents. He got some cute pjs (there is a picture farther down), some onesies, a coloring book, board books, little cars which he also loves and they were seriously tough to open, a winter jacket, a vtech camera (which has successfully distracted him from my camera which is off limits), Horton Hears a Who, and a basketball hoop. From his aunts and uncles he got shoes from Aunty Liz- pictures will come eventually- he loves them, a snowman cup, and quite a few large noisy toys and we have no clue where they will fit but Mikey loves them so that's what counts.

Jake was equally spoiled with all his techy toys- a voltage meter, pliers, mini screwdrivers, soldering iron, a tv mount, all three seasons of White Collar, Green Lantern, Live Free or Die Hard, a coupon book, a face mask - Jake LOVES facials- and we got the Hobbit and the LOTR books from Jeff and Whit- very exciting.

I think I was the most spoiled (well not counting Mikey and Adam's toys from the grandparents). I got a cricut, vinyl, a shelf, Mortal Kombat- seriously so excited about these, all three seasons of Veronica Mars, the Mummy movies, really cute boots a 32 GB SD card, a box of turtles, a really awesome tripod and a new flash for my camera, and... I am forgetting something but you don't really care.

Besides all that, we got lots of clothes for both little kiddos, a crib (!! to be delivered Jan 3), gift cards to Costco, Walmart, and Target, a game called Munchkins, Adam got a plush toy, and a blanket.

We were extremely spoiled but honestly, the best part was getting to spend so much time as a family. Jake's job, which is still excellent, gave everyone almost two weeks off this Christmas and it has been so wonderful getting to have him around.

 

Our Christmas Tree! It was beautiful before Mikey got to it but he enjoyed it so much that I don't mind that it got messed up

Our stockings- we got lots of candies. :D

Mikey was a little crabby- but check out his stash.. It's mostly fruit snacks. He loves those Reese Cups though. He unwraps the foil but unless he gets to eat the paper he isn't interested in the candy. Weirdo.
Also, how adorable are those pjs? Seriously.

Jake with his m&m's

Probably the first picture of me in months- I never get picturs taken and you can't even see my pregnant belly- but this is me, 40 weeks and 3 days pregnant. And I guarantee I am more tired than I look here.

Mikey LOVES his basketball hoop which I am so glad about. Look at how excited he is!

He is so good with it and he took to it right away. Jake showed him once and now everytime he sees the ball he dunks it. I am so proud. We are planning on him being the next Muggsy Bogues. :D

After presents we had a delightful little breakfast and spent the afternoon watching movies together. We finished the day at Jake's brothers house with his family eating dinner and opening the presents from Jake's family. It was a great Christmas and I love how different it feels with a little kid.

I hope you all had great days and be on the lookout for a baby post one of these days. We are hoping on any day now. Be excited- we make cute kids. ;) 

Oh just an update

Well how about a little update?

Jake

just has one final left- isn't that exciting? yay for the end of school

still loves his job

going to start full time after the baby comes

very excited for his family to come for Christmas this year

anxious for baby Adam's arrival

in reality, he is probably just as anxious as I am- I imagine he is just sick of me being pregnant

getting lots of cool toys for Christmas this year

just cannot wait to be done with school

I am so proud of Jake. Good job, done with school, great dad, wonderfully attentive husband.

I just picked good, that's all. ;)

 

Me

finished with school on campus- I have two independent study class left

still pregnant

being induced on Sunday if the baby doesn't come sooner

pretty sure I will be induced on Sunday

slowly but surely working on cleaning the whole apartment- done the kitchen, living room, and Mikey's room. Stupid bathroom and bedroom- they are killing me

been doing some sewing- made a baby blanket for Adam, matching car seat blankets for the boys

decorated for Christmas- it looks pretty good if I do say so myself

well the tree looked good at first- now only the top half is decorated, silly Mikey

Mikey

crazy energetic

was sick for about 5 or 6 weeks and now that he isn't anymore he is just absolutely crazy

points to my stomach when I ask him to say Adam

knows foot and nose

can say Dada, Mama(rarely), yes, no, and done

picks up his toys and puts them away when we ask, sometimes even when we don't

likes to throw stuff in the trash for us

loves loves loves to go outside

excited to be a big brother

probably about ready for only one nap a day and I am not sure how I feel about that

well that's untrue- I am sure that I am not ready for him to have only one nap a day

loves to play with his little vtech laptop, even though the mouse is broken

loves to play with my extra tripod- I think he'll be a photographer haha

 

Adam

strong heartbeat

big mover

loves Cap'n Crunch (if my cravings are any indication)

coming on Sunday- awesome

 

Well there ya go. Our family update. Not a lot to share. Lots of big changes going on around here and I am nervous, excited, terrified and exhausted about each one. Wish us luck.

Baby Month

It's baby month.
I literally have never been this anxious for anything in my life.
Not my wedding
Not my first baby
Not high school or college graduation
Nothing.
Notta.
I just gotta get this baby outta me.
I just want to hug him
And play with him
And watch Jake get all nervous because babies are so little
And I want to see Mikey point at him and go bah-bah like he does to all babies- even on tv
My due date is Dec 22.
I am praying that I will have him by the 10th.
That'd put me at 38 weeks.
I think that would be good.
Yeah.
Let's all think good thoughts about the 10th.
Well or the 9th.
Or 8th.
Or any single digit date in December.
We picked a middle name
which turns out makes me more anxious than before
Adam Pōki`i Logan
(Po-key-ee
that's the best I can do in terms of how to say it.
maybe we'll talk in person and I'll say it for you.
Or even better, Jake will.
I suck at Hawaiian. Just ask my sister in law. I can't say my nieces name.
And even worse, I can't hear why it's wrong.
I was made for english it would seem)
His initials will be APL- pronounced apple obviously.
It means beloved little brother.
Kinda.
I am gonna need Jake to explain it to me a little better.
It comes from a speech that King Kamehameha gave

 "I mua e nā pōkiʻi a inu i ka wai ʻawaʻawa. ʻAʻohe hope e hoʻi mai ai"

Go foward my younger siblings and drink of the bitter waters. There is no retreating.

I think it's nice.

I like that is has a story

Plus Adam Pōki`i has a nice sound to it.

On Being Pregnant

I hate being pregnant.
I hate having to pee every half an hour.
I hate that I grew out of my normal clothes (With Mikey I never did)
I hate that I wake up nauseous.
I hate that some days I spend more time leaning over a toilet than being with my boys.
I hate being kicked at all hours of the day.
I hate that I wake up every 45 minutes because my whole side fell asleep.
I hate the mood swings.
I hate people asking me how much weight I have gained- fyi people, unless I bring it up, steer clear of that subject.
I hate that I didn't get to have a baby shower this pregnancy- not for the gifts or stuff but because I miss adult interaction- being sick with a 15 month old leads to a lot of lonely days.
I hate that I can't pick my son.
I just hate being pregnant.

But don't get me wrong- I appreciate it and I do not take it for granted.
I am so grateful that I can carry children full term.
I am so grateful that I am able to deliver naturally.
I am so grateful that even though I get sick, my babies thrive.
I am so grateful that I get to experience this miracle and I do recognize it as one.
I am so grateful that my husband takes such good care of me while I am pregnant- and while I am not- although to be fair, we haven't had a lot of time together without me being prego.
I am so grateful that there are so many people that care enough about me to check up on me.
I am so grateful that I can feel my son kick because it means that he is growing and developing.
I am so grateful that I can't sit for longer than about 45 minutes because it means that I am getting close to delivery.
I am so grateful for indoor plumbing- seriously.
And most of all, I am so grateful that I get to do something as great as raise children. Some days when me and Mikey are having a particularly bad day and he is running around like a crazy person and I just wish I could lock myself in my room and ignore him, I get overcome with this feeling of gratitude for him (such a tender mercy) I look at him and I think to myself, Even if I don't accomplish another thing for the rest of my life, I think I will be satisfied because of him.  Every time he smiles at me, or hugs me, or says mama, I feel one of those terrible pregnant days slip away and it makes it all a little more worth it.

I hate being pregnant. But I love being a mom. I guess life is full of these necessary evils but I can't imagine anything paying back like this one.

In Flanders Fields

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torchl be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
              - John McCrae

Christmas! Snow! Winter!

I am not a huge holiday person. Never have been. I like to spend time with family and eat good food but more than that, not so much. I am not big into decorating (but this year I have been totally into it) and honestly, Christmas to me has always been the least exciting of the holidays. I don't like presents because I am not huge into surprises, and I don't like to give presents because it is hard for me to pick something meaningful.

This year though I am SO excited! I cannot wait for Christmas. We are staying home this year and get to have a fun little Christmas celebration with the 4 of us- because yes, there will be 4 of us. Crazy.

While we were growing up, we had these beautiful red stockings that my aunt made for us. I loved them and there is something about them that just screamed Christmas to me (and I did like stockings, as well as nativities, watching The Other Wise Man, reading the Christmas story from the Bible and singing Christmas music the whole month of December in church) But when my dad got remarried, Michele had these other stockings, also beautiful, that were all part of a set that had the Night Before Christmas on them- each stocking had a phrase and a picture and Michele made new stockings for the Merrill's so that we could all match. She started to make her own patterns that weren't from the poem and that is what mine is.

Here are mine and Jake's- Michele made him one when we got married. Jake's says the moon on the breast of the new fallen snow and mine, not part of the poem, says believe.

 When Dad and Michele came to visit after Mikey was born Michele brought a ton of sewing stuff and we made Mikey a stocking- not going to lie, I was not excited about doing this, I just wanted to hang out and look at my beautiful new baby but I wanted to be nice so I made the stocking. And I am so glad that we made them- I love them and they are actually pretty fun and easy to make (but I suck at binding so that is less easy and fun for me) We finished Mikey's fast enough that we started on one for baby #2- not at all expecting that we would need another one so soon.  I didn't love the ones from the poem so we made up two new patterns. Mikey's says there must have been some magic and Adam's (yes its official, Jake has committed to the name) says sometimes seeing is believing from The Polar Express.

I am so excited that I finished Adam's stocking before we decorated for Christmas because even though he won't do candy or anything, how sad would've it been for him to not have a stocking?!

My next project to do are the Baby's First Christmas ornaments- I didn't do Mikey's because last year we spent Christmas in Hawaii and I didn't have time to finish it and I didn't want to take it to my in laws and then forget it there.

But here is a picture of what I am going to do

only Mikey's will have an M on it with 2011 and Adam's will have an A with 2012. Fun right? I think they will be cute- and if they aren't, then none of you will ever see them!

PS- it snowed today. I LOVE snow. Happy Winter everybody!

Pumpkin Carving!

Tonight for FHE I had a coming of age moment. Like most of the LDS world (I assume), we carved pumpkins but mine was for the first time. Now I have attended ward activities where pumpkins were carved, and it's even possible that some carving happened at home while I was growing up but I can assure you that I never carved one (I am more of a spectator kind of person)

It turns out that the Logan clan are big into the carving tradition and so Jake planned FHE and hence, pumpkins.

We went to the store and picked out our pumpkins- I changed my mind a few times- Mikey got a little baby pumpkin that he seemed pretty attached to. We decided that a standard jack-o-lantern was a good idea for him so I drew it, Jake carved it, and Mikey tried to eat it.



Mikey licking his fingers after repeatedly dipping them in the pumpkin guts




He got a little more intense about the eating and stole the spoon we used to clean it out.
Isn't he just so cute?



Here are the finished products- sorry the picture is junky. Mikey's is the little one, Jake carved our family, even down to little baby #2 but you can't really tell at all and mine says the Logan's with a witch hat- not the most creative carving but come on now, it was my first time

 

Here they are unlit- not a bad group I'd say.

This Halloween has been the first one I have really embraced in years and I am so happy that we carved pumpkins! What a fun family tradition to have. Granted, unless Jake is opposed, I will probably retire my knife and go back to being a spectator with my camera instead- but still, it was one more thing to cross off my bucket list. ;)

A Job! A real grown up job.

Jake got a job!


We are very excited about it.
Jake calls it his "big boy job".
I call it a real job- basically means the same thing though.
It is called Moki Networks.
It is in Thanksgiving Point.
It is part time and when he graduates it moves to full time.
It is basically the same thing he was doing on campus but the atmosphere is more fun (or way funner as Jake says) and the pay is better- way better in fact. (we will get to have a Christmas! Wahoo!! ;])
Jake says the people he works with are really cool.
It is such a relief knowing that Jake won't be unemployed when he graduates (in 8 weeks- holy crap) and we are so grateful for the opportunity.

I love Canada

Did you know that I love Canada? (just not always Canadians)

I think that it is just the greatest place ever (keep in mind my extremely limited and unexperienced world travels and views)- I really mean that I think Alberta is... haven't spent much time in any other province haha

It is a beautiful country.

Our national animal is a beaver- truly what is cooler than that? (I might concede that Afghanistans is the Kuta- those are pretty cool)

We have colored money.

We acknowledge the Queen- I think that is pretty awesome.

Two national languages- granted I don't like French but yay for diversity haha

It's huge which is cool.

I love winter- everything about it so that is fun

I love wearing sweaters in the summer and drinking hot cocoa with my breakfast on July 1st.
I love the people that I know there- I have a great family and friends.
I love that I have had roommates that judge an entire country by me and the handful of other Canadians that they have met (I had one roommate tell me that all Canadians were attractive and nice people- I can confidently deny that statement)
I love that we have a Prime Minister and Premiers- especially since Alberta's Premier used to be a drunk- and unless I am seriously mistaken he was considered to be a pertty good one- yay for politics!
I think its hilarious how people can be so ignorant about a country
I love that we have different words for certain things- pencil crayons, garburators (how on earth do you spell that?), washrooms, scribblers, Kraft Dinner, soothers, and so many more that I can't even think of because they are all so normal to me- and that so many people get so confused by them.

But! You know what I don't love?
I don't love that Canadians get so worked up about the fact that Americans don't know everything about our country. Do I know everything about China? Or Mexico? Or France? or even Canada? No- isn't it a tad bit unreasonable to expect others to know what we ourselves don't know?
I don't love when I meet people from Canada and they expect me to have the same intense ego driven belief that Canada is leaps and bounds above any other place in the world when I haven't experienced enough of anywhere else, or even Canada to make those judgments.
I especially don't love when people get into arguments about how we are better. Remember how annoying it is to argue about things that can never reach a conclusion? Well I certainly do.

So when I get crabby about Canadians that are too intense for me, I remember all those great things that I love and I remember that even if some are annoying there are some pretty kick-a Canadians- like me. ;)

Great Weekend! I love October

What a fun weekend!
Malcolm, Val, Alicia, James, Arianne, and Shelly all came for the weekend and it was delightful.
On Friday night we (we being Malcolm, Val, Jake and I) went to the football game and it was beautiful- the weather was actually so nice and eventually even once it got colder I had hot cocoa so what could be better. Shelly watched Mikey and Alicia for us which was really nice of her. James and Arianne stopped on their way down from Rexburg to pick up Shelly and the traffic was so bad it took them like 4 hours or so to get to Provo from Logan- nuts! Jake was late for the game because he waited for Shelly to get there and we decided everyone didn't need to be late and then he had to park really far away. I thought I was going to die walking all the way to the car from the stadium and truth be told, I am still feeling it. (I hate being pregnant- in case I haven't made that clear. Being a mom- awesome but if there was any possible way for me and Jake to have our own kids without me being pregnant I would jump on that so fast. I understand adoption is an option but Jake doesn't want to do that so here I am, stuck being pregnant forever haha) 
On Saturday we watched Conference which was great. I really enjoy how they seem to talk about parenting and families so much. This conference especially I loved the talks about children. My favorite talk was Elder Oaks. I am sure that it won't necessarily make him that popular with everyone but I love him a little more for it.  Mikey and Alicia were so good during conference which was wonderful and they just love to play together. Seriously. When one goes down for a nap, the other one cries. If one cries for whatever reason, the other one tries to comfort them. It's so great to see and I hope that they will be able to be good friends forever and with Scarlett too. Jake and Malcolm went to the Priesthood session and Shelly and Val went shopping and I stayed home to watch the babies. It was great. It reaffirmed my desire to not have twins, especially ones that are 14 months old but it was great to play with them. It's nice to have the kids around without other people because then they like me! (I think I am probably the least favorite aunt but that's okay because Mikey likes me)
Sunday we watched Conference again and James and Ari came over for Canadian thanksgiving! Wahoo! I love Thanksgiving so much! Definitely my favorite holiday. Who doesn't love a holiday that is celebrated by just eating and focusing on the good parts of your life? After Conference Jake, Mikey and I went and met the newest addition to the Logan family. Jake's sister had a baby and she is just a doll. But sadly, I cannot say her name. Literally. I cannot pronounce it. I practice and Jake is like yeah that is good and I say Really? (All excited because I mastered it) and he says well no not really but it was close. Gah. Don't worry though. I'll get it eventually and if I don't, then I will just call her a nickname or something... or nothing at all. Haha. And to end the weekend, we went to Mal and Val's hotel and played games.

By now everyone is home safely and hopefully they all enjoyed the weekend as much as I did. It was great to get to celebrate so many of my favorite things in one weekend and I cannot remember a more appropriate weekend for Thanksgiving.

(sadly, I barely took any pictures and the ones I did take were of Mikey and Alicia climbing in between our shelves which I would post but I cut Mikey's hair and it looks... not great so I am not emotionally prepared to show it off. Yay for being pregnant.)

Nauvoo and an Update- Plus two pictures. Lucky.

 The past few months have been crazy. We had that insane week in August when everyone was here and then right as things were calming down, school started and then we made a quick trip out to MO for my grandpa's funeral :( It was great to get to see so much family and I am so grateful that Jake finally got to meet more of my mom's family but I wish it could've been under better circumstances. Amazingly enough, my whole family managed to get out to the funeral which is quite the feat- our family is getting so big and it just keeps on growing. We are now at 6 kids, 5 in-laws, 4 nieces/granddaughters/daughters and 2 almost 3 nephews/grandsons/sons. It's pretty fun, but at the same time extremely tiring. Hopefully we are going to be able to have a family reunion next summer and who knows how many people there will be then! Things change fast in this family.  After the funeral Jake, Mikey, Shelly, and I went to Nauvoo! It was so fun! I love that place- it's like my Disneyland. I love all the history and senior couple missionaries and the temple and the buildings and the church and everything! This time, for at least the first time in my memory, we got to do a tour of the Community of Christ properties- the Homestead, the Mansion House and the Red Brick Store.

Our little family in front of the Red Brick Store

I have way more pictures from Nauvoo but I can't pick which ones to put up so I am going for a minimalist approach. Besides the tour, we went to the Temple (just outside, we didn't have time to go in or have someone to watch Mikey), the Blacksmith shop, the Visitor's Center, the Family Living Center where we made a rope- Jake thought it was pretty awesome, took a carriage ride (and the senior missionaries driving were from Cardston- that was pretty fun, they knew Grandpa Reed and Uncle Mark), the Post Office, Rendevouz in Old Nauvoo, Brickyard and the Bakery. It was a very full day and poor Mikey was pooped by the end but he played it like a champ.

And here is my little update on each of us
Jake: is looking for a job and getting lots of interviews from going to the job fair, we are still just waiting for some more offers, working hard to finish school- only two classes! Wahoo! He is still working at his campus job as a web developer for Learning Suite and thankfully he enjoys the work. Imagine getting all the way through a program and realizing you hate the work? Wouldn't that just be awful, I know it happens to some people but I am so grateful that its not the case with Jake. He finished my photography website: www.nitelitephotography.com which I am extremely excited about. And he is just so excited to have a second son and likes to play with my belly (which drives me nuts but how can I say no when he says 'I am playing with my son'?)

Me: school and Mikey and being pregnant. That's my life. I hate school this semester because I am completely overwhelmed. I am taking 9 credits on campus and 6 independent study classes and the IS classes are so stupid. I cannot discipline myself to work on it because there are so many other things I would rather be doing. A while ago I started to make weekly menus but I sucked at following it so about 2 weeks I sat down and made a 4 week menu and have been fairly successful at sticking to it. Some times I switch days but I do pretty good and to make things better Wednesday is Jake's day so I get a break! The pregnancy is hard- still sick and have lost a grand total of 12 pounds. I am almost 29 weeks and so incredibly uncomfortable all the time. I can't sleep through the night and am typically awake for at least an hour around 2:30. Awesome. I have done one photoshoot recently and it was wonderful but I have learned that its harder when pregnant because all the crouching and adjusting and such pulls weird on my stomach but I still just love taking pictures.

Mikey: He is running all over the place- and yes I mean running. He walked for about a day and then decided that wasn't good enough. He is constantly covered in bruises but he handles it well. Cries for a minute, gets a hug from me and Jake and then he is good to go and discover a new body part to bruise. He likes to chase Jake around the apartment and is currently working on mastering the fake out- its hilarious, I need to film it and put it up. He has big personality and gets so excited when Jake gets home. We normally pick him up from school and when we pull up to the spot, every day Mikey goes Dada? And gets confused if anyone besides Jake walks by. He says mom and dada and nods yes and no which makes life so much easier, as well as his pointing- thanks to his cousin Scarlett for teaching him that! He is 29.5 inches and just over 21 pounds as of a week ago. He loves music and dances to just about anything he hears, and is the king of car dancing (a skill we mastered on our long road trip out to MO) and he also loves bathtime and by the time he is done we are typically as wet as he is and he is just as proud as can be.

 

 

Baby #2: growing well and kicks like a soccer player on steroids. (I think that my placenta is in a different place from last time because sometimes it hurts a lot more) He has a really strong heartbeat but is causing some health problems for me but that is just the nature of being pregnant I suppose. According to his ultrasound from a few weeks ago he is just as healthy as can be and we just cannot wait to be a little family of 4! Just over 11 more weeks to go! Merry Christmas to us!

Look at this little man. He is looking like a little boy now, not a baby and its so fun! Especially since I have another little boy on the way so I don't even have to miss newborns!

 

 

Update!

This past week has been nuts, well actually the past two weeks. Both families were in town which was hard and honestly, I did a terrible job juggling. I just wanted to spend all my time at home because I am used to having a lot of alone time. But I suppose there is no need to dwell on that now. I think that by the end the grandparents were pleased with their Mikey time- which in reality is what the were really in it for.

On Friday the 10th we graduated! Huzzah. It was exciting. Well in reality it is just a fake day because we don't actually complete school until December. Plus it was way hot. Bleh, those gowns don't really breathe. Even more exciting- on the 10th Mikey turned 1! How awesome right? What a big kid we have.

On Saturday the 11th, we had a birthday party for the "triplets"- Alicia, Scarlett, and Mikey. Unfortunately, Scarlett and her family didn't get to come for that but Jordan surprised us on tuesday by bringing her along so here they are!



This was taken at James' wedding on Wednesday 15th at Mount Timpanogos Temple

Here are a few pictures from the birthday party. Val did a great job with decorations making it Mickey and Minnie themed and Jake and I did the food with the exception of the cake- Michele did the cakes.

( I wanted to add more b-day pics but my computer is being silly and won't let me) But isn't that totally cute? You can't tell but in the background there are banners that say Happy Birthday and one with each of the kids names on it. Awesome.
The next big event was James' wedding- it was really nice. Married at the Mount Timpanogos temple in American Fork on Wednesday 15th then we had a family luncheon at Stonegate Center for the Arts which is a pretty cool building, which is also where their reception was held. And boy oh boy, the food from the reception was SO good. A pasta bar. Delightful. We all got pretty tired towards the end though.
Next was Gideon's wedding on Friday. At the Salt Lake Temple and then there was a luncheon and a reception. The reception was at the McCune Mansion in SLC and it was awesome. That building is seriously cool and the reception was so fancy. I am glad that we got to be part of two weddings because that is such a blessing to our family but I am also glad that I don't have to do it again for a long time.

On Saturday the 18th we had Mikey's other birthday party with the Logan family. We had it at Carterville Park and the food was excellent. Plenty of people come and Mikey made out like a bandit with all his gifts. It was so nice to get to share his day with so many people we love. Especially exciting was Jake's family from Hawaii and his McKinlay cousins got to come, some of them I have never met before... unless I am sorely mistaken and if so, my apologies and my promise that I won't forget you again.

And now, even though this is a seriously long blog here is a brief individual update.
JAKE: doing great, really loved having his family here. Still just about the greatest dad and Mikey adores him. He starts his final semester on monday with three classes to go and then he is a college graduate with a degree in Computer Science! I am so excited for him and it will be so nice to not have homework and school and all that jazz.
MEREDITH: I am doing about as well as can be expected. After such a busy week I am still tired and working to catch up on my energy. I am having a really rough time with the pregnancy and have to wear a heart monitor for the next day or so because I am having dizzy spells and have fainted. I am also starting my last semester and I am constantly praying that everything in the pregnancy goes alright so that I can actually finish my  classes and be done at school.
MIKEY: Mikey had his 1 year check up today and had to get 6 shots which was awful but Mikey is so brave. He cried a lot but Jake was there so he cheered up pretty fast. He is 20 lbs 4 oz and 29 inches long. He is in a pretty low percentile but I still feel like he is a good size baby. He sleeps like a champ and is such a happy and social baby. He is starting to decide that he has a little stranger anxiety, which honestly, is probably not a bad thing and he is getting more clingy all the time.
BABY #2: We had out official ultrasound on the 7th (maybe...) and they changed my due date to December 22 which is a little bit of a bummer because I am not interested in having a Christmas baby but all in all its probably better for the baby to be due after finals- even though they come whenever they want. And we are having a BOY! We are so excited! Especially Jake. Logan #2 was very proud of being a boy, we have a picture of him all spread eagle showing off everything, Jake was proud.

Well I hope you made it to the end. We are pleased with how things are going, even though I am sure they could be going better. But if Jake was here he would say the opposite and that things could in fact be going a lot worse. Gotta love that guy.

Today is my last day of my french class.

Which means it is the last day before the first day of my last semester!

Can you believe it?

I don't want to get over excited here but I can truly say that I never thought I would get to this point.

I am just so proud of myself.

On December 14, all of the life goals I set while I was younger will be achieved.

Except Europe.

But I almost did that - that counts right? haha

However those goals were not achieved in the order I thought

At all.

Interesting how life works out.

But ya know what?

It's better than I expected.

August

I've never been a huge fan of the month of August- Let's be real here- I hate heat. Ask me any day- even the coldest of the year- and I would tell you that I would way rather be blue because of the cold. I love sweaters and blankets and socks and toques and scarves and gloves and all that jazz. Ya know what I hate? Shorts and t-shirts. (well to say I hate t-shirts is a little strong but definitely warranted for the shorts) Besides the heat, it was always just a long and lazy month that ended with having to go to school- which was always one of my favorite things- weird how things change...- anyways, it just seemed to go so slowly and I was so anxious for September- school, autumn, leaves slowly changing colors, one month closer to my birthday and thanksgiving- favorite day of the year- I don't know any other 20-ish year old girl that pack away Thanksgiving dinner like I can- don't believe me? Ask my brothers, or my sister- while your at it, ask Shelly about pie ;)  uh... tangent, my bad.
Well this August is crazy! No joke. Starting August 4 until August 20, we have both families coming (all the family- except my lovely sister inlaw and her three kids- *sad face* I will miss them), 2 bridal showers, 2 birthday parties, 2 weddings, 2 sets of bridal pictures for me do (yay for photography!), 1 graduation, 1 ultrasound,  2 doctors appointments, a family reunion-ish thing (I obviously don't know much about that one), 3 birthdays- all turning 1, 1 move (not me, my sister), 1 bachelor/bachelorette party, 1 final exam, 1 final project due- whew, I think that is it. Plus my lovely little son is now walking (but mostly falling and gets quite upset), becoming a pickier eater (I was hoping he would take after his dad in that regard but I guess we don't always get what we want) and then we have a one week break until fall semester starts.
Then we are in school until december 14 I think- never to return to a classroom again! Hurrah! But before that happens we are going to have another baby! And, hopefully find Jake a job. And then in January our housing contract ends and we have to figure out if we want to move or not (which may be unnecessary because we don't know where he'll be working) - man oh man- our future, near and far, is looking full and bright.
I wonder if we'll ever get a break- wish us luck!

Graduation Presents

Do people get graduation presents?
I don't really care ultimately.
But if someone wants to give me a present,
I would like some new pajama pants- all of mine are at least 3 years old
Probably 2 or 3 pairs
And a white BYU hoodie
not a Cougars hoodie- one that says BYU.

Like this one.

Tacky

You know what I think is tacky?
Taking something as incredibly tragic as the shooting in Aurora CO
and turning it into a huge political statement about racism in America
or the effect of violence in the media
or when they 'glamorize' it (for lack of a better word) by giving it a catchy title
like the Colorado Movie Massacre.
Whether that is the purpose of what they are doing or not,
it is what seems to happen.

You know, I hate racism as much as the next guy
I don't believe that the color of your skin
or home country defines the person that you are
but don't take a man that has a mental illness
and use him to tell the world that we are unfair and racist.

Remember how before they claimed mental illness
it was called domestic terrorism
and oh my goodness- he is white.

Bleh.

I get easily bugged. My bad. Please forgive me.

**Note: I am not saying that racism is not a problem in this country or in this world.
I am not saying that the media is evil and is ruining the world
But, it still bothers me. Think of the people that have been so profoundly
affected by this tradegy and imagine how sad they must be
that the world is turning it into something catchy and a huge statement.
Can't it just be sad? Can't people have a little time to mourn? At least a buffer period?

Picture Update- Enjoy!

So I stalk peoples facebook and blogs and I realized that I am absolutely terrible at posting pictures. You know why? I hate putting stuff online- not because I am worried about a creeper finding a picture of Mikey and then finds him by way of shadow trigonometry and the location of stars but because it takes a long time and frankly, I have other and often better things to do. But! Then I realized. His poor grandparents! One set lives in Alberta and one in Hawaii and I know how much they must love this little stinker -and his parents too :] - and how they don't get to see him. And why not share this precious face with the rest of the world- it can only make it a better place.

Now get ready- I take lots of pictures. This is not even a drop in the bucket compared to how many I have on my photography harddrive.

Auntie Shelly's graduation! I picked this one because Mikey was just as crabby as Alicia but he is such a camera baby that I don't think he can not smile when a camera is pointed at him, kind of like not being able to say to food.

We took Mikey to the duck pond because the kid was scared of grass and we had to put a stop to that right away! And instead of feeding the ducks, he fed himself. (good news- no longer scared of grass, in fact, he now likes to eat it- surprise surprise)

For Father's Day I was trying to think of a nice gift that Jake could have that would be inexpensive and maybe a little sentimental- bear in mind, I am the sentimental one in this relationship so I knew it had to be pretty good for Jake to really want it. So! I found this cute poem online:

I love to wear my Daddy's shoes
Though my feet are small
When they are in my Daddy's shoes
I feel 10 feet tall
Someday I'll grow to fill them
I only hope to be
As fine as a man and great a dad
As my Daddy is to me

Cute right? Well I made the picture black and white and put the poem on it, framed it and voila! It is now hanging in a place of honor (over Jake's desk) and Jake says he loves it.  Below is the picture that I used- I took maybe 10 and this one worked the best.



Also for Father's Day I made them matching shirts! Really simple- Just Dad or Mikey on it and number 1 and 2. It is cute when they match- you can't tell here but I swear Mikey looks just like his dad

 

One day, when I was resting in my room (I get so tired, yay for being pregnant) I hear Jake say Baby come and look at your son. I walk out into the front room and almost fell over I was laughing so hard. Mikey found food coloring - which we didn't know we had - and ate it. It was all over- his leg, behind his ear, his feet, hands, face (this picture was taken after a few clean up attempts) Eventually after vinegar, baby wipes, soap, scrubbing, a bath, nail polish remover and oil he was just a faint tint. Aren't kids fun?

Baby Contest! He didn't win- I know, shocking right?- but it turns out that it was more a pagaent and less a cute baby contest and if you know us, (which I assume you do or why else would you be reading this- unless you are that before mention creeper- watch out, my husband is a big guy) you know that is not our cup of tea so to speak. But it was still fun.

Auntie Shelly showing that she is browner than her "brown" nephew. They are basically best friends.

Mikey did not love the princesses walking around the baby contest, but they loved him.

Caught red handed! Look at this cute face- how does one get mad at this face? (I mean, it has happened but seriously)

 For Jake's birthday, we asked his parents for a kiddie pool for Mikey to play and boy oh boy what a good idea that was. We have a little water baby if there ever was one. He loves to stand in the pool- I think because Jake does and he wants to be like Daddy- but he just splashes and talks and screams and its great!

He was yelling because Jake splashed him- what a bully. But don't worry- Mikey can hold his own

This is his "Mom,  I am playing, stop taking my picture" look.

Our wonderful upstairs neighbor's son just turned 2 and had cupcakes and because that little guy is such a sweet guy he wanted to give one to Mikey- and did he ever enjoy it!

Well I hope you enjoyed this Mikey blog! And I hope that you made it to the end!

We just love that little guy and cannot wait for there to be two little rascals making messes and getting into things here at our little apartment.

An Update

Jake: working- lots. I think he likes it though- he has a friend that he seems to have a good time with and I know that he enjoys hanging out with people that are interested in the same nerdy tech stuff that he is. He is currently building me a website and since I have no idea how that works, what I want is pretty tricky stuff- but we are working it out. He is also being super dad because I am sick and tired and being pregnant is hard and guess what- Mikey loves it. Jake is so much fun with him. He has two games that they both seem to really enjoy- first there is Toss the Baby which is basically Jake dropping Mikey onto our bed and Mikey laughs hysterically and crawls back to Jake so they can do it all over again (not going to lie- I hate this one but they both seem to love it so much that I just deal with it, typically from the living room) The second game is Chase the Baby. Mikey crawls off and Jake chases him. But Mikey constantly stops and turns around to make sure that Jake is still following him, so if Jake hides around a corner Mikey will come back and Jake will jump out and scare him- boy oh boy does he love it.

Me: I am taking a class and I don't like it but its okay because I only have about 4 more after it. I am sick but it is exciting to feel the baby move and I cannot think of a better reason to be sick than for my baby. I am trying to get Jake to pick baby names with me but he doesn't want to- so far for a boy we are thinking maybe Adam (for my mom's maiden name) and for a girl either Isabelle (my Grandpa Merrill's grandma) or Emma or Jane (which, unless I am mistaken is just one generation above Isabelle-- I need to talk to Grandma Jan about this) and we don't know about boy hawaiian names because that is Jake's territory but for a girl, regardless of what Jake says, her hawaiian name will be Ku`uipo which is the equivalent to Jill in hawaiian (because they both mean sweetheart) And by "we are thinking" I mean Jake hasn't  completely shut them down but we do know that our kids are going to have family names- I think it is nice, something to live up to if you will.

Mikey: Oh he is crazy. Sleeps a lot, eats a LOT, plays a lot, makes a lot of noise and we love it. He is getting close to walking (according to Jake, I think he is a ways off still but I also thought that about crawling and Jake was right, so who knows) He loves his grapes and strawberries and! We have officially found the first food that Mikey does not like. I mean he will still take 4 or 5 bites before he stops opening his mouth but geez, is he unhappy about those bites- and the winner is raspberries! He hates it, its funny because he will still eat them. I don't think he knows how to say no to food.  (I am trying to feed them to him because I heard once that is takes like...uhm... more than one try (haha) before your dislike of food is solidified... I don't know, my aunt told me about it)

So all in all we are doing pretty good- we have a lot of good things going for us and we are walking for graduation in just three short weeks, the same day Mikey turns 1! We aren't actually finished school until december but still- graduation has gotta be cool right?

hmm, looking back this is kinda long... hope you made it through!

A Way with Words

When I was in high school I was constantly being complimented because of my way with words. Not going to lie- I loved it. I was told that I explained things well, I was clear, I was funny, witty, etc. etc. etc. I am not sure if I really believe it but still, always nice to hear nice things. Well then I moved to Utah and I started to date this guy- and he was terrible with words- he was constantly stumbling around and answered questions that were three comments old and he just really didn't get it. It drove me nuts- I liked him enough that it wasn't an instant deal breaker but man oh man, I just didn't understand how someone could have such a hard time. Sometimes he would tell me that I was good with words, and me being the ever so gracious person that I am would think "well I should hope you think so." Needless to say, we didn't work out.
Then I met Jake. Jake is a man of few words. But when he speaks it is clear that he has thought about how and what to say and if he doesn't think that he can adequately explain what he is thinking, he just doesn't try. And I have noticed something- now that I have married him, people comment less and less on my talent with words... hmm.
The point of this is I love to blog. I love to share things with the people that care enough to click on over to my page. But I get so annoyed because I do not have the talent with words that some people do. For example, my sister Shelly. She does great. Her blog seems so articulate and like there is a point. My Aunt Cheri is constantly sharing these stories and recipes in the most beautiful ways. My friend Michelle has the cutest blog and updates everyone on her life and its wonderful. My cousin Eden has a beautiful blog with a wonderful mix of her incredible pictures and amazing tributes.
Point: I am jealous, therefore I do not blog much. Sorry, that is just how it is. Jake says I have this problem where I give up on things because I am not willing to get better at them. As he says, I am not willing to suck for a while first. I suppose that is true. But here is my goal- I am going to be willing to suck at blogging for a while and, hopefully, I will get better at it.

Wish me luck.

I've been thinking lately...

I belong to the greatest church. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It is the best thing in my life. And that says a lot- I have a pretty amazing husband and a beautiful child with a second on the way. But guess what, I wouldn't have ANY of that without the Church.
It is a beautiful thing. We are taught the importance of family, honesty, love, compassion, service. We have an incredible humanitarian program that shows exactly what my church teaches. We have strong beliefs and values. And we respect other peoples rights to having different beliefs.
Now, why can't we have that too? Why can't we stand up for our beliefs and values without being told we are wrong and narrow minded? Why can't people be as open- minded as we (at least try to) strive to be? Don't get me wrong- I am not perfect, and besides that I don't know a single member of my Church that is perfect. But we try. We try to be respectful of opinions. We try to express our beliefs and values without demeaning others.  I just want to have beliefs and values without being told that I am narrow minded, disrespectful and ruining people's lifes. Is that really too much to ask?
It would be a beautiful thing. My dream is that when Mikey is an adult, people act the way they expect everyone else to be. Being open-minded doesn't mean being liberal. It means being willing to consider both sides of the argument. And even more, being close-minded is not synonymous with conservative.
Anyways, it is just something I've been thinking about...

A Curatorial Internship from the (slightly) cynical view of me

In order to get credit for my internship, which is essential to me graduating in December (well an internship or study abroad), I have to write a review of my experiences and submit it to my internship counselor. Here is one...

For the past 5 weeks I have been a curatorial and registration intern at the Springville Museum of Art. I have to complete 140 hours and I have completed 101(I am dancing about this as you read, I assure you), with my final day to be June 14- hopefully. (the first 30 hours of that internship were spent taking pictures, editing them and importing them into a document all alone in the cave for the 88th Annual Spring Salon People's Choice Award- that binder took years off my life- it was rough and I am unconvinced anyone besides me sees it for the true masterpiece it is- no joke, its perfect- not a typo or spacing error in the whole 52 pages- my dad taught me everything I know about perfect computer layouts-way to go Pops, I am making the curators of the museum proud- what with all the signs and forms I make that I'll never get credit for- pfft)

I walk around the museum with an air of importance when in reality I am about as low as you can get there. I spend the majority of my time struggling with the outdated and on the verge of breaking computers in the intern room (also known as the cave), being expected to answer questions about things I have never heard of, I walk up and down the stairs constantly because I have pregnancy brain SO BAD and forget everything from the key to the cave to my water bottle to the forms I need to complete my condition reports.

Ah, condition reports. Another one of my wonderous tasks- a fellow intern and I spend 15 to 20 minutes staring at a work of art, our noses almost touching the canvas and record every last imperfection- all the while being careful not to get a drop of sweat, spit on it or breath on the work too heavily. A little speck of dirt? We write it down. A miniscule piece of paint flaked off, on just the top layer of the paint making the overall color in that area uneven? (even though the work looks so perfect to the throngs of people beating down the museum doors to look at it) We circle it on our black and white pixelated image of the work and hope that we wrote it in the correct location. On one painting, a beautiful piece by Zimbeaux (a Utah artist, the SMA's area of expertise) there was a pin hole in the painting, I kid you not, no bigger than half the eye of a needle and we freaked out! It was a travesty- a hole THAT big! A sin, an error beyond comprehension, what kind of monster would do such a thing to an innocent and lovely work worth more than my car? When it was new. After I calmed down, I laughed about how this internship is making "problems" in my life blown out of proportion. A tiny error and the world is ending. If someone had a hole that size in their wall, chances are good they wouldn't even notice. I have to wait more than the typical 3 seconds for my email to load and I am about ready to grab a baseball bat to smash the thing to bits. 

Also, one of my other typical assignments- research. The three curatorial interns spend a lot of time researching random artists and you know, that is not half bad. I enjoy learning random facts about people and seeing how it effected their art. And since I am sick from the pregnancy I get to do research hours at home (score- no idea how excited I am about this) so this aspect will only continue to get better. Of course, the major obstacle with regards to this is that we have some incredible works by incredible artists that no one cares about outside of the 20 people that work at the museum (well in reality the finance department and operations don't care about the artists- they can tell you how much the work cost and how significant the work is to museum attendance but the artists? Not so much) You know how hard it is to research someone that the internet thinks is a  15 year old skateborder from Cody, Wyoming that loves punk music and video games? Just in case you don't pick up what I am putting down, it's tricky. 

Overall, I am not sure if I love it- most days I don't even know if I like it. I still like art, studying art and I am glad that I picked this as my major but if I could go back in time 4 years, I would pick the study abroad- and somehow, even though I would've been in Europe, Jake would've magically wanted to date me and marry me all the same so I could have my wonderful family. (Sigh- wouldn't that be awesome?)

Turns out this internship has taught me that as much as I love art and museums and all that jazz, I just do not have the right temperment for the job.

So what do you think? Is this the review I should turn in?